Everyone in their life will definitely have some regrets in their life didn't they?
Same goes to me.
I do have regrets in some part of my life.
Although I have a full list of regrets in my life,
I do have one particularly that I had done 3 years ago.
Which is to break off one of my friendship just because of my stupid childishness and narrow minded attitude of mine.
The reason why I was soooo regretful right now is because I feel,
Unfair to my "good old friend of mine."
I feel that, if I wasn't that stupid enough at that time,
We would be still friends right now or, even for a lifetime.
And plus, after looking back at the past,
We had so much memories and so much fun that we had.
I just feel so bad, about myself.
Though I know I cannot claim back the friendship that we had,
Neither the trust from you.
But I just want to tell you that,
I am so sorry from what I had done to you.
I wish I can apologize to you from what I did in the past.
And if I have a time machine,
I will definitely turn back the time when we first met.
And,
I wouldn't be that foolish ever again.
I just hope you might read this post.
I don't need you to do anything in return or something,
But I just want to let you know,
I really sorry from what I had done.
If you had anything to say about me, just call me or text me.
I wouldn't be a coward,
Not anymore.
Sunday, September 8
Sunday, August 25
Love
Being so gullible and foolish in my past relationships had made me realize,
I had never experienced true love before.
I always believed that in a relationship, you are already in love.
However, there is a difference in true love and a just casual love.
Okay, this may not sound like me but,
I am experiencing true love right now.
You may say that I am lucky as I am currently dating with my crush and let's call him, bear. (FYI, this is a nickname that I gave to him cause he really look like one xD)
Everyone's dream is to be able to get together with someone who you really likes, especially your crush.
While, maybe this is just fate as bear and I have feelings for one another before we got together.
So everything started with just a confession, from me and I swear that was my best night ever.
Things gone simply smooth and an blink of an eye, we had been together for seven months (And still counting.. :D)
As I know his ambition was to become a pilot and we didn't really had a real talk about it.
But one day, he just asked me this question,
"Am I important to you or my ambition is important to you?"
That really strikes me.
As you know, being a pilot is not as easy as it seems.
Sometimes, being a pilot can take up to 12 years of your life, just learning how to fly, especially you want to be a fighter jet pilot.
I knew that, he really really wants to be a fighter jet pilot badly and that was his dream.
But what we worries about was that,
This decision of his might affects our relationship real bad.
Imagine, someone that you loves, need to leave you for 12 years, somewhere far away from you.
What would you do?
Would you leave that person or will you just wait?
That was the time it really test my feelings for him.
Of course, I do want him to be with me all the times literally.
Love is always selfish.
However, I told him to go ahead with his ambition, even though it might cost me to wait for him for 12 years.
Why?
I want him to be happy.
Happy not because of our relationship,
but doing the things that he wants and love the most.
With that, I will be happy too.
And that is what a true love all about.
Able to give up something that you want for someone's true happiness.
I bet if one day your boyfriend/girlfriend suddenly told you that he/she will be leaving you and be away for 10 years, would you still want to be with him and wait for his return?
Those who truly love she/him will, but nowadays, more and more people are treating relationship like a game.
Most people would just break up or dump that person because they feel without able see or talk to that person for a long time will make them feel insecure in that relationship.
Well for me, I wouldn't.
Okay, you might say, oh is too early for you to say so blah blah blah.
But you know, he is my first love.
I had never love a person so much that I can just sacrifice all my life and time for him.
Even if one day he will be away and we couldn't talk for a few months, I wouldn't feel angry or even insecure about it.
Because I know, I love him and he love me too.
I can swear right now that I will be faithful to him no matter what.
Because, he is my only one thing that can make me life wonderful.
If you know me close enough,
This is not the usual things that I will say or even confess.
But, I just love him so much.
So much that I can go for the extra miles, just to see him or be with him.
So much that right now, I have a purpose in life right now, which is to just love him.
"When you love a person, you will just forget all the expectations that you had set for a perfect partner because you had realized, he/she is the ideal one."
I had never experienced true love before.
I always believed that in a relationship, you are already in love.
However, there is a difference in true love and a just casual love.
Okay, this may not sound like me but,
I am experiencing true love right now.
You may say that I am lucky as I am currently dating with my crush and let's call him, bear. (FYI, this is a nickname that I gave to him cause he really look like one xD)
Everyone's dream is to be able to get together with someone who you really likes, especially your crush.
While, maybe this is just fate as bear and I have feelings for one another before we got together.
So everything started with just a confession, from me and I swear that was my best night ever.
Things gone simply smooth and an blink of an eye, we had been together for seven months (And still counting.. :D)
As I know his ambition was to become a pilot and we didn't really had a real talk about it.
But one day, he just asked me this question,
"Am I important to you or my ambition is important to you?"
That really strikes me.
As you know, being a pilot is not as easy as it seems.
Sometimes, being a pilot can take up to 12 years of your life, just learning how to fly, especially you want to be a fighter jet pilot.
I knew that, he really really wants to be a fighter jet pilot badly and that was his dream.
But what we worries about was that,
This decision of his might affects our relationship real bad.
Imagine, someone that you loves, need to leave you for 12 years, somewhere far away from you.
What would you do?
Would you leave that person or will you just wait?
That was the time it really test my feelings for him.
Of course, I do want him to be with me all the times literally.
Love is always selfish.
However, I told him to go ahead with his ambition, even though it might cost me to wait for him for 12 years.
Why?
I want him to be happy.
Happy not because of our relationship,
but doing the things that he wants and love the most.
With that, I will be happy too.
And that is what a true love all about.
Able to give up something that you want for someone's true happiness.
I bet if one day your boyfriend/girlfriend suddenly told you that he/she will be leaving you and be away for 10 years, would you still want to be with him and wait for his return?
Those who truly love she/him will, but nowadays, more and more people are treating relationship like a game.
Most people would just break up or dump that person because they feel without able see or talk to that person for a long time will make them feel insecure in that relationship.
Well for me, I wouldn't.
Okay, you might say, oh is too early for you to say so blah blah blah.
But you know, he is my first love.
I had never love a person so much that I can just sacrifice all my life and time for him.
Even if one day he will be away and we couldn't talk for a few months, I wouldn't feel angry or even insecure about it.
Because I know, I love him and he love me too.
I can swear right now that I will be faithful to him no matter what.
Because, he is my only one thing that can make me life wonderful.
If you know me close enough,
This is not the usual things that I will say or even confess.
But, I just love him so much.
So much that I can go for the extra miles, just to see him or be with him.
So much that right now, I have a purpose in life right now, which is to just love him.
"When you love a person, you will just forget all the expectations that you had set for a perfect partner because you had realized, he/she is the ideal one."
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